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CHUMP LADY ARCHIVES
IT’S ALL HERE!
Thousands of posts since 2012, this is a dataset of mightiness. This is where chump stories live, in posts and comments. You’ll discover your cheater isn’t unique. Their manipulations are common. And your nightmare is finite. (The pain stops on Tuesday.)
ALL THE THINGS I CANNOT SAY
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1-12 of 2,478 results
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How Do I Deal with My Cheater Dad?
She wants to know how to deal with her cheater dad and his relationship demands since her parents’ divorce. *** Dear Chump Lady, I am a college student who watched her parent’s marriage implode four years ago due to my father’s infidelity. My mom, without many close female friends or family members, slopped her grief… -
Is It an Apology If It’s Full of Self-Pity?
Her ex sent an apology for cheating, but it was full of self-pity. So does this still count as a sincere apology or not? *** Dear Chump Lady, It’s hard to know where to start, but I divorced a serial cheater. Not only did he cheat with multiple women over the course of our 21-year… -
Un-Chumping Post-Infidelity, A Primer
Since starting this blog, I’ve been asked several times in various different ways how I transformed into a happily married person post infidelity. Hey, you were such an epic chump — how did you ever trust anyone again? Did you fix your picker? Are you just stupid lucky? Where did you meet your husband? How… -
6 Reasons You Don’t Need an Apology from a Cheater
You do not need an apology from your cheater. Despite the fact that so much of the reconciliation literature and our own damaged feelings call for one. It’s so galling. They broke this relationship, this family, and they’re not one bit sorry. Well, they SHOULD be! I demand an apology! And I refuse to heal… -
Pregnant and Pick-Me Dancing
She had a D-Day while 28-weeks pregnant, and now she’s pick me dancing to save her marriage. And has so many questions why. *** Dear Chump Lady, My husband and I met at 19. We were super toxic in the way we communicated, he shut down and I always pushed for him to talk, he’d… -
Managing Divorce Expectations
A good lawyer can help you manage your expectations around divorce. Remember lawyers are not therapists. *** It’s always a good idea to manage your expectations around most things. What’s this? A scented candle? NO, I WANTED A PONY! Life has a way of broadsiding us. This is especially true when it comes to divorce. Now,… -
Want to spot a narcissist? Just ask one.
So this psychological study popped up in my feed recently on how to spot a narcissist. Researchers at Ohio State tried to simplify the Narcissist Personality Inventory test. You know that test? Where you go out in the wild and capture narcissists in butterfly nets and coerce them into lengthy, controlled psychological studies? Chumps are… -
Can I Go No Contact with my Step-Daughter?
She wants to know if she can go no contact with her step-daughter. She’s cut off contact with her ex and doesn’t want to open the door. *** Dear Chump Lady, My D-Day involved a stranger texting me about my cheater’s profile on a “sugar baby” site. He had spent $30K (much of it my… -
50 Shades of Moral Ambiguity
So many articles about infidelity tell people not to judge, moral ambiguity is best. Chump Lady has some thoughts on this. *** I’d like a bitter bunny bitcoin for every popular infidelity click-bait article that says, “Infidelity — it’s not so black-and-white!” Black. And. White. Moral judgment. How gauche, how narrow-minded. How dunderheadedly simplistic of you. On Facebook… -
UBT: ‘Dear Therapist’
The Universal Bullshit Translator takes on Lori Gottlieb’s column “Dear Therapist” where she questions a woman if the cheating really happened. *** Sometimes I wonder if I made up the Reconciliation Industrial Complex. How could advice be so manifestly stupid and devoid of commonsense? It’s a joke, right? Some kind of cruel performance art? Then… -
He ‘Has a Problem with Women’
Her boyfriend has a “problem” with women and s*xual acting out. But he says he’s going to work on his issues and be the boyfriend she deserves. *** Dear Chump Lady, My boyfriend of three years told me he had a problem with p*rn addiction and s*xual fantasizing of other women. He said he had… -
Chump Lady Blog versus Tracy Schorn Substack
Since I updated the look of the Chump Lady blog here there’s been some confusion over what lives here versus on Substack. I decided to end the ambiguity. All fresh content now lives at Substack. But! I will be rerunning columns here 5 days a week, so you can still get a hit of snark…
POPULAR POSTS
The posts everyone sends their friends.
What Marriage Counselors Get Wrong About Infidelity
Marriage counseling on infidelity usually presumes reconciliation. Like this article in the Washington Post that the Universal Bullshit Translator recently pilloried — “Should an Affair Be Disclosed?…
When Does the Pain Stop? (Tuesday)
When does the pain of betrayal stop hurting? Why can’t she see him for who he really is and throw him out? *** Dear Chump Lady, Tonight is a hard night for some reason. It has been 11 months since D-Day. And since then stories of other affairs and how long I have been a…
My Ex Is Introducing Her Affair Partner to the Kids
He’s recently divorced and distressed that his ex wants to introduce her affair partner to the kids. They don’t know mom cheated. *** Dear Chump Lady, Here is my situation. I’m 6 months divorced from my wife of 15 years. We have 4 kids, ages 5, 7, 9, and 11 (yes, we planned well). Long…
Tell Me How You’re Mighty
Tracy, co-host Sarah Gorrell and guests talk infidelity, recovery, and the mysteries of the karma bus.
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THE SECRET SEXUAL BASEMENT – AN INTERVIEW WITH DR OMAR MINWALLA | EP.14
worst cheater gifts| EP.40
could your cheater have a personality disorder? an interview with dr peter salerno | EP.100
