Reconciliation Skepticism
EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW
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The Fallacy of ‘Unmet Needs’ and Affairs
If I could wave my magic Chump Lady wand and rid the world of one founding principle of the Reconciliation Industrial Complex, it’s that affairs happen because of “unmet needs.” You failed, ergo they cheat? The argument goes that cheaters cheat because they weren’t getting what they “needed” from the relationship, and so they sought out… -
10 Questions to Ask Your Unfaithful Spouse
Did you just discover an affair? Here are 10 questions to ask your unfaithful spouse after D-Day. Assume your cheater will not lead with unvarnished honesty. Ask these questions anyway and pay more attention to their actions than their answers. (Defensiveness is a bad sign.) Did you use protection? Get checked for a full panel… -
Beware the Timid Forest Creatures
A classic tenet of the Reconciliation Industrial Complex is the Timid Forest Creature. I’m sorry, your cheater is too fragile to answer your questions right now. *** After you’ve been cheated on, you’d think it’s a pretty simple decision tree — reconcile or divorce. Choose divorce, it doesn’t matter if your cheater is sorry or…
POPULAR POSTS
The posts everyone sends their friends.
What Marriage Counselors Get Wrong About Infidelity
Marriage counseling on infidelity usually presumes reconciliation. Like this article in the Washington Post that the Universal Bullshit Translator recently pilloried — “Should an Affair Be Disclosed?…
When Does the Pain Stop? (Tuesday)
When does the pain of betrayal stop hurting? Why can’t she see him for who he really is and throw him out? *** Dear Chump Lady, Tonight is a hard night for some reason. It has been 11 months since D-Day. And since then stories of other affairs and how long I have been a…
My Ex Is Introducing Her Affair Partner to the Kids
He’s recently divorced and distressed that his ex wants to introduce her affair partner to the kids. They don’t know mom cheated. *** Dear Chump Lady, Here is my situation. I’m 6 months divorced from my wife of 15 years. We have 4 kids, ages 5, 7, 9, and 11 (yes, we planned well). Long…
Tell Me How You’re Mighty
Tracy, co-host Sarah Gorrell and guests talk infidelity, recovery, and the mysteries of the karma bus.
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THE SECRET SEXUAL BASEMENT – AN INTERVIEW WITH DR OMAR MINWALLA | EP.14
worst cheater gifts| EP.40
could your cheater have a personality disorder? an interview with dr peter salerno | EP.100
